New York I love you but you’re bringing me down

New York for me, like many people holds a special place in my heart, we honeymooned there, a place I thought to be progressive.

But people and places aren’t always what you think, sometimes surprising me unpleasantly.  If there’s one issue that’s dear to my heart and my experience is that of teen parenthood and that support is needed not shaming.​

New York has failed miserably with a new ad campaign presumably to scare kids out of falling pregnant.  Which in itself is laughable considering the miniscule proportion of teen pregnancies that are planned.​

I’ve mentioned before that being a parent as a teen is no easy task.  Being a parent full stop is not easy and I can tell you the thing that has the most impact on the difficulty of being a teen parent is the weight of others judgement and being shamed instead of supported.  Make no mistake a campaign like this one won’t make teenagers be more careful or make teen parenthood any less attractive, because it’s not attractive,  all it does is wound existing young parents who need help not harassment.

I wonder how much help they could have had if the Mayor had spent $400,000 helping them instead of shaming them?


I’m so disappointed that people think emotional blackmail is the way to
change peoples lives.  I’m so disappointed New York I thought you were
better than that, clearly I was naive.

Advertisements

Gratitude v Greed

Gratitude

A vision of gratitude and a voyage of greed

  1. I can now explain away my bad habit of buying many, many, house magazines as *cough* research.​  Love the benefits of studying in a field I am passionate about.
  2. & 3.  I painted my ​nails for the first time since Eve was too little to notice, it was lovely to spend some time on me, even lovelier to watch her fascination at having her toes painted red.

Greed

Yes that’s right some lucky married couple is going to travel around Mars in 2018 and I wish it was us.

​See previous weeks here

Will the real voters please stand up?

I read an interesting post by Carli at Tiny Savages (a lady who I can always count on provoking my thoughts and making me look at my assumptions), called Will ​the real politicians please stand up?  Carli talks about disillusionment with our political representatives, but what it brought up for me is my disillusionment with voting behaviours.

Two incredibly frustrating yet seemingly common voter behaviours in Australia are:​

Voting because that’s the way their family always voted

Deliberately voting incorrectly so your vote doesn’t count

​Both get under my skin because like it or not your vote is important, why would you not want to stop and think and vote for a party / independent that you believe is going to be the closest fit for your values.

Why not take the time to peer past the media and PR spin that clouds this issue? Why not reexamine whether tradition is in this case valuable or just easy?​

“Tradition becomes our security, and when the mind is secure it is in decay.”


Jiddu Krishnamurti

Why throw a vote? Do you consider yourself to be so unimportant that you passively let others choose your destiny? Or are you tragically unaware of what others went through to secure your right to vote?​

​Is it all too much effort?  Is it just too much time to take out of your life?  Annoying enough that you might waste a whole morning at the polling station as it is? You know our peaceful polling stations where the worst thing that happens to you is being harassed by people flapping how to vote cards in your face or maybe the person you’re waiting behind farts.  Is it just too much for our privileged selves?

While people in Kenya risk and lose their lives in order to vote,*
we baulk at research,  we whine about hitting a few keys and sifting
through information in the comfort of our home or office?​

​Sadly we’re a country who’ll queue for an iPhone or relentlessly bash the keys to secure concert tickets, but secure a thoughtful considered vote not so much.

Tell me I’m wrong, tell me you care about your vote? Or if you didn’t this year you’re going to?

*Yes in the article someone had a whine about waiting in line, I’d not be too happy hanging out in line there either it’s a just ​a little​ less cushy than we’re used to.

So far so messy

I am officially in to my second week of study and well as the title says so far so messy.

Finding enough time means letting a few little things slide, like Eve emptying the bookcase so I can read an article.​

Dealing with artistic annotations when I turn my back to get a cup of tea.

Driving the artist around in the car to try to get her to nap so I can get more work done and feeling awash in the ocean of learning.

Messy but fulfilling.​

Reviews in Real Life – Houdini Stop

​There are a lot of products that I buy in an attempt to solve a problem or make my life easier, some work and some are useless.  I’ve decided to review them here, good, bad and indifferent.

The Problem – A very cheeky toddler working her arms out of the car seat straps while we were driving.

​The Product – Houdini Stop

What I Paid – $22.00

How it should work –​  The Houdini stop simply clips around each shoulder strap securing them to each other preventing the child from pulling their arms free.

Does it work? – ​ So far so good.  We bought it last Saturday morning after Eve not only freed her arms but began to climb out of her car seat while we were driving, which was absolutely terrifying.  After pulling over (quickly) and re-buckling her it was straight to the baby shop to find a solution.  We chose the Houdini Stop because it was the only product available.

It is incredibly easy to install, simply clipping around each strap and does not slip up or down the straps once in place.​  Unbuckling is also easy as you can undo either side (there is no need to remove both) so no matter which side of the car seat you are getting baby from you can still get them out with minimal fuss.

I honestly expected a lot of fuss and screaming from Eve once she discovered that she was strapped in but for some reason she has been more content in her car seat than ever before. In fact the only peep I’ve heard ​since installing it is Eve exclaiming “Oh WOW” while touching the lettering on the strap.

Would I buy it (again)? – ​Absolutely! I can even see me gifting these to friends down the track, the peace of mind has been worth every cent.

Where to buy –​I bought ours at TTN.         They are also available at Baby Bunting​ for $19.95

I was not gifted product or paid for this review, should that be the case in future reviews I will always disclose this in the what I paid section and honestly evaluate whether I would pay for the product myself.

Gratitude v Greed

A dose of Gratitude and a dash of Greed

Gratitude

  1. Lovely delicious rich brownies, topped by meringue, made by Tyler.
  2. While we all have a horrible cold, Eve is still bouncing around and happily making us laugh, like here with her wedging a tissue behind her dummy.
  3. Needing a brain break from studying Architecture makes me truly grateful that I can stream my favourite shows like Grand Designs and The Block, shake your head at my idea of a break I know I have a problem
  4. My laptop screen which Eve destroyed by throwing a glass at will hopefully be replaced this week.​
  5. Linking up with other Aussie Bloggers and their Facebook group Aussie Bloggers to love to share ideas and support.​  If you’re an Aussie blogger you should check it out too.

Greed

Made by Original BTC – I think the softness of this would be lovely in our bedroom

 

Need more gratitude in your day?

Visit my friend Jess at Icecream and Buckets

and Rebecca at Pomegranate & Seeds

Dear (imaginary) baby

Since the ‘incident’ that pushed me to decide there will (most likely) be no more babies, I’ve had a touch of melancholy mixed  with wistfulness about the baby I had imagined we would have.​  A piece written by Sash has encouraged me to vocalise this and in an effort to put it out there, let go and move on I wrote this.

Dear (imaginary) baby,​

If things were different we might be preparing for your conception, but instead I am packing away and getting rid of baby things that will not be used for you.​

But some reminders of your absence will not be packed away.

Some tangible like the beautiful rocking chair that I purchased thinking that it would be where I fed you and documented your first year, the special pieces of clothing belonging to Eve that I planned to use for you. 

Others intangible like the names rolling around now permanently relegated to the ether, Magnus if you were a boy Blythe if you were a girl or possibly Celia, maybe Astrid, they will not be narrowed down without you.

I watch Eve and her tenderness with new babies and am saddened that she will never meet you and teach you all the naughty and beautiful things that she excels at.​

​The knowledge that it has always been difficult does not diminish the sorrow of knowing I will never breastfeed again.  Nor does my puffy unmodel like pregnancy figure outweigh the desire to feel the strange beauty of feeling someone grow within me.

I wonder who you would have looked like and if you would have been laid back or busy like Eve.  ​

I wonder if my patience would have multiplied like I know my ​love would have.

Dear sweet (imaginary) little one I know you would have been a true blessing, I just don’t know that I would have been the mother that you deserve.​

All the love that I will never get to lavish on you.​

X